


the han gang

by infiniteus (smackavoys)



Category: B1A4, Block B, EXO (Band), GOT7, Infinite (Band), K-pop, T-Ara, Teen Top (Band), f(x), 소녀시대 | Girls' Generation | SNSD
Genre: Friendship, Idol Life, Multi, also: idol issues such as mental health n scandals n substance abuse, but also cute things like secret dating and "family dinners", my biases are in one big friend group n theyre all depressed alcoholics who love each other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-12
Updated: 2018-09-09
Packaged: 2019-06-26 11:43:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15662565
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smackavoys/pseuds/infiniteus
Summary: Three in the morning every Sunday, where the Han River flows past Seoul, the Han Gang drive up to take a load off. What started as a night of beer, good food, and good company suddenly becomes the idol industry's best kept secret.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> cross-posted on aff. 
> 
> lmao hey guys. so this idea has been bouncing around in my head and i just honestly need to write or else i might go crazy. this'll be less plot-heavy and not necessarily romantic! the characters are just some of my fav idols and idk i thought it'd be nice to have all my biases in one friend group. the title HAN GANG is a play on the korean word for han river, which is literally han gang too lmao. anyway i hope yall enjoy it!

 

> **HAN GANG group chat  
>  1:28 am / sunday**
> 
> **yoonim** : we on for tonight?  
>  **jiwhiz** : YES  
>  **krys** : def!!   
>  **krys** : i had a shitty week  
>  **myungpoo** : lmao same  
>  **markymark** : nice one funky bunch me too  
>  **pcyeol** : cant make it, got a sched );  
>  **krys** : booooo  
>  **yoonim** : boooo  
>  **jiwhiz** : boooo  
>  **chansick** : booo  
>  **pcyeol** : fuck u guys i didnt make yall feel bad when u all were busy and it was just me and ssulli free  
>  **hyoms** : lmao u act like u minded  
>  **ssul** : SAD  
>  **llamber** : ddddead hahahahahah  
>  **jjinyoung** : oh no ahahah  
>  **jjinyoung** : chan-ah lets go?  
>  **chansick** : ayt im down  
>  **yoonim** : nice bring booze  
>  **namu** : me n myungsoo gon try to make it  
>  **myungpoo** : bitch im goin dont bring me down w u   
>  **myungpoo** : he's trying to flake bc he wants to stay home  
>  **hyoms** : lmao typical  
>  **namu** : :*  
>  **namu** : LMAO wait that was supposed to be :(  
>  **chunjizz** : nasty  
>  **markymark** : """typo"""  
>  **pcyeol** : guess he's so used to sending her kisses  
>  **hyoms** : omg  
>  **hyoms** : stop hahahah  
>  **krys** : no denial hmm  
>  **jiwhiz** : ok anyway back to the topic !!!  
>  **hyom** **s** : hihi thanks jiyeon  
>  **namu** : sorryyy  
>  **jiwhiz** : same time and spot as always  
>  **yoonim** : game  
>  **ziaco** : yuppp see ya

* * *

Krystal pulls up to their spot at the river's edge at exactly three in the morning, and shuts off the engine. She looks around the secluded area, lit only by a lone lamppost standing tall above the ground, so high up the light it gives off is no brighter than the moon's. "Fuckers are always late," she sighs, but without any contempt. This ritual of theirs is simple and easy - to try and force it on each other like a schedule would be counterproductive to the idea behind it in the first place. Krystal grins as she remembers the very first one.

She had still been dating Jongin - it was heading south at that point, but she still loved him nonetheless. Enough to take him to the spot her older sister had introduced to her, one that absolutely no one knew about. It was an abandoned factory on the edge of the river, where just across the water you could see the towering skyscrapers light up the Seoul skyline. She remembers grabbing Jongin's hand as they sat on the hood of her car that autumn evening, and just as he turned his head to kiss her, a pair of headlights appeared, along with the sound of tires rolling through gravel. She hops off her hood and walks to the source, which had stopped in an almost comical way at seeing that there was someone else there.

"Hey!" she yells, unsure if she wants to sound threatening. She puts her hands on her hips and she figures, maybe she does want to sound threatening. This could be a stalker, or the owner of the lot, yeah, but really the only thing she was worried about was how the secret spot she had shared with Jessica was not just hers anymore. She falters slightly at the thought, and nearly jumps in surprise when Jongin steps to her side and puts an arm around her. 

The window on the driver's side rolls down, and the loud blast of hip hop music breaks through the air. A hand pops out. "Hey, hey! Didn't think my spot would be so popular." The driver turns down the music and shuts off the engine, before hopping out of the car. "Well, at least not around this time. October's pretty cold to be coming here."

Jongin laughs as he and Krystal walk closer to him. "Zico, right?" He nods and playfully gives them a salute. Jongin turns to Krystal and another laugh escapes his lips. "Damn, what a small world. Guess our date got inter-"

Krystal moves out from under Jongin's arm and folds her hands across her chest. "Your spot?" Zico pauses for a beat, taking in her blank stare before chuckling and giving her a shrug.

"It's pretty secret, sure, but you can't be surprised that other people know about this." He takes a few steps backwards and opens the rear door of his SUV, pulling out a six-pack of beer. "Now this was gonna be just for me, but since you guys are here - care for some?" Zico holds out the six-pack at Krystal and Jongin with a smile. She considers him for a moment before returning the smile and taking a can. Jongin does the same. 

They pop open the back of Zico's ride and sit themselves down with their beers. Krystal thinks it's nice to be able to talk to someone so freely again - she was usually closed off when it came to talking to other idols, but sitting there with her boyfriend and Zico, she thinks, 'they'd probably think the same thing considering they've got eyes on them 24/7, too.' They drink, and laugh, and at the end of the night, she's kinda buzzed when she finally asks Zico. "How'd you know about this place?"

"Tablo-hyung. Said he came here every once in a while when he needed 'healing time' or whatever," he hiccups. "Not to be cheesy, but I guess it works. If I don't come here as often as I do, I'd probably go crazy." He takes another swig of his beer. "I mean, we all knew what we signed up for when we wanted to be famous but shit, man. Gotta have a break."

Jongin nods and tosses his empty can aside. "Yeah, I think we all get that way. I mean we do get time off but we never really get to let our guard down. Kinda fucked up. There's always somewhere to be or someone to call and we just end up feeling bad for taking time for ourselves when there's more work to be done."

"That's exactly it, man. Over here it feels like time stops, or at least slows down. Even if I'm up till sunrise when I come here, I always feel better when I get home. It's like some kinda weird magic."

Krystal laughs. "That's how Jessica used to describe it, too." Her heart swells when she remembers her sister telling her the same thing. "When she was feeling pretty drained she'd bring me here. Told me I'd be grateful for it every time, and she was right."

"Yeah, it helps you not burn out completely. Gets you through another day packed with schedules, non-stop rehearsals. Probably why I'm pretty protective of this place." Zico grins and stands up. He playfully gestures for them to go away. "Shoo, kids. I got an early day tomorrow, or-" he looks at his watch and laughs, "later." Krystal and Jongin stand up and start walking to her car, waving goodbye.

"Take care," he tells them as he shuts his trunk. "Let's make this a thing, yeah?"

She grins at him and nods. "Definitely."

"Knock, knock!"

Krystal nearly screams when a fist knocks on her window, snapping her out of her reverie. She opens the door of her sedan and steps out, greeting Park Jiyeon with a hug. Jiyeon laughs as she wraps her arms around Krystal. "Sorry, should've known I was interrupting a daydream." The latter pulls away and shakes her head.

"Nah, it's fine. I was kind of early so I zoned out."

Jiyeon nods in understanding before raising a bottle that had been in her hand. "Well, for waiting, I've got something for you!" Krystal takes the bottle and inspects the label before looking back at Jiyeon, impressed.

"Moët? Fancy. It's a step up from our usual beer and soju." 

Jiyeon giggles. "I swiped it from Eunjung's house. She won't mind." Krystal rolls her eyes but pulls Jiyeon by the hand to the edge of the river. They sit on the ledge and face each other, and Jiyeon uncorks the bottle without difficulty. As it opens with a pop, a voice reaches their ears.

"I hope you ladies aren't going to chug expensive wine straight from the bottle!"

The two girls turn their head almost simultaneously and exclaim, "Chunji!" He laughs and takes a seat next to Jiyeon. He holds out a stack of paper cups from the paper bag he'd been holding and Jiyeon takes one with a smile. "Thanks," she says. "And it's champagne, not wine."

He feigns annoyance. "Oh, I'm sorry I'm not as cultured as you," he replies, to which Jiyeon simply shoves his shoulder and pours herself a glass. She passes the bottle to Krystal, who makes herself one. "How was your week?" He asks them, pulling out a pack of cigarettes, bringing one to his lips and lighting it. He takes a drag and turns his head to the two girls.

"Sucky," Krystal shrugs. "I didn't eat for two days because I had non-stop shoots. And whenever I had free time it was always a choice between sleeping and eating." Jiyeon and Chunji hum sympathetically. She pulls the cigarette out of his hand and inhales deeply, before slowly blowing out the smoke as she begins to talk.

"Mine was okay," she says. "Don't really get busy 'cause I haven't been getting a lot of work lately, which I guess sucks too." She sighs and swings her legs back and forth on the ledge, gaze fixed on the water below them. She had never thought she'd want to be busy, and hearing Krystal complain should have made her relieved she wasn't working that much anymore, but being in this group and seeing everyone else talk about work and seeing each other at broadcasts made her miss being so active. Chunji puts his hand over hers and gives her a soft smile. She looks down at their hands in slight surprise, and contemplates letting it stay there when the noise of multiple cars break the silence.

The three of them turn around and stand up, squinting against the glare of the headlights as three cars park in front of them. Krystal raises a hand to give the arrivals the middle finger, yelling. "Turn off your headlights, idiots!" The cars' engines shut off and their drivers step out and walk towards them. "Gosh, you'd think you guys would know to turn off your high-beams when you're literally driving towards people." 

Myungsoo and Sungyeol bow dramatically when they reach them, holding up bags of food and beer as a fake peace offering. "I'm so sorry, Miss Jung." Krystal can only laugh and take the beer from them when the passengers of the two other vehicles greet them. 

"What is up, my dudes!" Mark says, raising his hands up as he walks between the two Infinite members and slings his arms around them. "Guess we're all running pretty late." He turns his head to Gongchan and Jinyoung, who smile sheepishly and shrug. "Anyway, got the cooler in the back. Let's get our drink on."

* * *

 

> **HAN GANG group chat  
>  8:41 am / sunday**
> 
> **chunjizz sent a photo  
>  ** chunjizz: LMAO MARK  
>  **markymark** : oh god  
>  **chansick** : OH DANG  
>  **yoonim** : yall lame half of u went home before i even got there  
>  **ziaco** : ikr noona  
>  **ziaco** : how could u guys be dead so soon  
>  **markymark** : HEY i hadn't slept in 30 hours ok  
>  **myungpoo** : lame xcuse  
>  **jiwhiz** : yea doesn't excuse puking in the back of my car  
>  **yeollipop** : LOOOOL  
>  **jjinyoung** : good luck mark  
>  **markymark** : i said i'd pay to have it cleaned!!! im sorry PLS FORGIVE ME  
>  **jiwhiz** : i had to drive with the windows down to drown out the smell of ur stank ass vomit   
>  **markymark** : harsh  
>  **chunjizz** : but u... puked in her car.... LMAO  
>  **jiwhiz** : t h a n k  u  
>  **yeollipop** : yea u did a lil bit on my shoes too bud  
>  **markymark** : aw fuk my bad  
>  **myungpoo** : let's not forget  
>  **myungpoo** : that krystal puked too  
>  **krys** : oh fuck off lmao  
>  **krys** : forreal tho i need to sleep  
>  **hyunahh** : YES  
>  **hyunahh** : go to sleep homies  
>  **hyunahh** : stop blowing up my notifs u woke me up  
>  **ziaco** : mute us u coward  
>  **hyunahh** : ill block ur asses if u keep talking
> 
>   
>  **hyunahh** : nice. good night x

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was pretty stale but I stand by it. I need to get all the word vomit out and I haven't written in ages so I'm rusty but hopefully a little time to warm up my brain again will help me develop this into a real thing. as of now I'm writing this with zero plot in mind so LMAO whoops but here it is!! this is more of a normal night out for the gang, and obviously not all eighteen of them will be going out at the same time because a) that sounds like a nightmare to write and b) it's impossible to hang out with the complete group so often when you're all normal people, what more when you're idols? and there's eighteen of you? omg hahaha anyway hope yall found it adequate x


	2. Chapter 2

> **private chat  
>  9:49 pm / friday**
> 
> **jiwhiz** : hey um  
>  **jiwhiz** : you busy tonight?  
>  **myungpoo** : not rly  
>  **myungpo** **o** : just finished my table read  
>  **myungpoo** : why?  
>  **jiwhiz** : im at the spot  
>  **myungpoo** : it's a friday tho  
>  **jiwhiz** : yeah idk im  
>  **jiwhiz** : feelin kinda off  
>  **jiwhiz** : sorry, just didnt want to be alone but  
>  **myungpoo** : heading to u   
>  **jiwhiz** : u should rest if u just got off work  
>  **myungpoo** : im heading to u  
>  **jiwhiz** : no forreal its ok  
>  **myungpoo** : lol too late

* * *

It's a little past ten in the evening and Jiyeon's sitting on an old crate, facing the increasingly turbulent waters of the Han river. She gazes as the wind slaps the water from side to side, the reflection of the many buildings in Seoul breaking and distorting in the small waves. "Feels like me," she hiccups to herself, before laughing at the dramatic statement. One week back on antidepressants, and she's having a lot more crying spells than she remembers having when she first started the medication. Her chest feels tight again, and she braces herself as the same strange feeling overcomes her once more, swelling until the tears form in her eyes. She wipes her tears with the back of her hand and sighs, before reaching for the whiskey bottle next to her.

She lifts it up eye-level and checks how much liquor is left inside. "Ooh," she mumbles to herself sadly (people think her talking to herself is cute and quirky, and she'd rather have that than admit that hearing her own voice is one of the only ways she can stay grounded and remember reality.) The bottle's about only a quarter full now, but she shrugs and takes another swig. The whiskey slides down her throat easily, leaving behind the burn that she's gotten used to in the hours she'd been drinking by herself. She winces despite the fact, and stands up to move closer to the edge. 

Jiyeon gazes at the city skyline just across her, and sways against the wind. Surprising herself, her voice breaks through the sound of the wind rushing past her and she finds herself singing. " _Good days and bad days will come, but the only person I think of is you_ ," she twirls as the words come out of her mouth, eyes still closed. 

She remembers the first time she'd been invited to this place. Mark had dragged her and Chanyeol into his car, telling them to simply trust him. "Swear, you guys'll love it." She had raised an eyebrow but simply complied, even as he pulled into a sketchy compound. Chanyeol quipped that he always knew Mark would end up murdering them, to which the latter simply rolled his eyes and scoffed, "okay, dude."

After exiting the car, Mark gestured for them to follow him. The two of them lingered behind him as they made their way through large shipping containers, before the sound of laughter reached their ears. "Who is that?" Chanyeol asked, and Mark simply laughed before changing his pace, walking faster to the source of the sound. 

"Mark!" Multiple voices said in unison. Jiyeon's eyes made out several silhouettes in the darkness. She recognized a few SMTOWN artists, and some other faces who she sometimes bowed her head to at music programs - back when promoting wasn't such a pain and her reputation wasn't so fragile. But her eyes travelled to the most familiar figure, and her heart skipped a beat when her eyes took in the unmistakable (even in such darkness) face of Kim Myungsoo. 

She remembers how his eyes met hers with his signature piercing gaze, and he smiled. Sungyeol had nudged him with his elbow, his wide smile bright as always, and Myungsoo stood up, walking over to her, and as she opened her mouth to speak, he wrapped both his arms around her, and for the first time in a long time, she felt at ease.

" _I've thought about this before, in the near future - you and me, together_ ," she continues singing, smiling at the memory. 

"You always liked that song," a voice reaches her ears and she exclaims in surprise, eyes flying open. She turns around abruptly, nearly stumbling backwards off the ledge, before he grips her arms and holds her steady. "Easy there," Myungsoo says, giving her a smile and helping her off the ledge. She looks up at him, breathing slightly ragged from surprise. He simply looks back at her and laughs.

"Y-you're here," she says drunkenly. "I told you not to come."

He rolls his eyes and pushes his finger against her forehead. "And who do you think would drive your drunk ass home?" She laughs shakily, before realizing her blurry vision was not only from intoxication, but tears once again welling up in her eyes. He pauses and regards her with worry. "Hey, I- uh, that was a joke. Don't cry because of me," he urges, pulling her into a tight hug like the first night they had met. She laughs again, voice steadier than before.

"No, no," she reassures him, voice muffled against his chest. She pulls away slightly and he looks down at her, loosening his arms slightly. He tucks her hair behind her ear.

"Hm?"

At this point, her heart is hammering against her chest and she wonders if he can feel it against his own. She angles herself away and looks at the ground. "It's my meds, can't stop crying 'cause of them."

He pauses for a moment, before nodding. "I get it," he says, and he sincerely hopes that she knows he's not just saying that. He'd never been on medication, but in such a toxic industry, he's met more than a few medicated artists, and he knows that Sungyeol blocks out his Wednesday afternoons for "personal time" but really it's to go to therapy. "You shouldn't be drinking on your meds," he teases, but doesn't press the issue.

She presses her lips into a flat line, before shrugging. "I'm still adjusting." She steps away from him and brings the bottle of alcohol to her lips again. He sighs and looks around. 

"Didn't bring a car?"

She lowers the bottle and inhales sharply after swallowing the harsh drink. "I came here with Chunji. He had to leave for a schedule."

Myungsoo fights back a grimace. "And he left you here without a ride?" He shakes his head and takes her wrist. "Come on, let's get you home." She frowns and lets him lead her to his SUV, biting back words in defense of Chunji. She knows that had always been such a sensitive topic for him, and she'd rather not open up that can of worms knowing she's about to spend half an hour in a car with him.

She climbs into the front seat without a fuss, even remembering to put on her seatbelt, albeit with a little difficulty. He closes the door for her and rounds the car, getting into the driver's seat to start the engine. Almost out of habit, she reclines the seat and angles the A/C towards her, closing her eyes. "I'm sure you miss this car," he murmurs, pulling out of the compound and onto the road. It's a Friday night and the vehicles in traffic mostly consist of equally drunk people being driven to the next club, or maybe home, so he drives at a relaxed pace.

He turns his head for a moment to look at her, and he smiles. She must have missed his comment, from how her head is swaying from side to side on the seat, so he simply shakes his head in amusement and continues to steer, propping his elbow on the center console's armrest. His eyes are fixed on the road when they widen in surprise, as he feels her small hand rest on his arm, before slowly and lightly wrapping her arm around his. Her body is completely angled towards him now, and she leans her head against his arm as she curls up on the passenger seat. "I'm drunk," she mumbles, and he hums in agreement. "I'm glad you came."

"Of course," he says, voice coming out higher than he expected it to. He clears his throat, slightly embarrassed. "Can I ask what brought this on?" He knows Jiyeon almost as well as he knows himself, so he chooses his words carefully. He knows she has her days, and knows not to pry but still reassure her that he's there for her. It's been a few months since their rather unceremonious "breakup" - if you could even call it that when they were never even together - and although she still turned to him during her episodes, he knows that sometimes he's not on the top of her list of names to call when they happen.

She makes a sound, a very light groan that somehow morphs into a whine. "Nothing! That's the thing." She had never been very good at expressing her feelings, but Myungsoo knows that getting  _any_  answer from her at all is a good sign.

He nods slowly before speaking. "O _kay_ , well, do you-"

"I don't really want to talk about it," she interrupts. There's a pause, and then, "Not that I don't want to talk about it with you, I mean, I just-" She sighs. "I guess I just don't want to talk about it until I can make sense of it to myself. I've just been feeling really... empty. Like I'm just living day-to-day and there's no bigger picture. I mean, I can barely see myself a week from now." She squeezes his arm. "I just don't want to talk about it."

He chuckles, and thinks to himself that everything she had said was already talking about it, but he chooses to change the subject. "So," he teases, "Chunji?"

She doesn't respond, and he turns his head to get a look at her face. Her glassy eyes are lost in thought, and he clears his throat again. He's beginning to apologize when she speaks, says, "Yeah, we've been hanging out." He chews on the inside of his cheek absentmindedly, wondering what to say as they pull up to a stoplight. "I mean, that's not weird, right? We're all friends," she sits up and turns to face him, "right? I mean, if not for the group we never would've started hanging out as much again."

He smiles softly and takes her hand, lacing his fingers with hers. "Yeah, we are. Ride or die, remember?" 

She returns the smile and leans back again, keeping her hand clasped in his. The rest of the ride is quiet, but when the car slows to a stop outside her apartment building, the last thing she wants to do is leave. He puts the car in park and turns toward her. She's got this look in her eyes that is so earnest and captivating, one that he recognizes as hope, and a little bit of regret. 

"I - uh, I don't know how to say this," Jiyeon says, fidgeting in her seat. She points a finger out the window before bringing her hand down to chew on her thumbnail. "Do you want to spend the night?"

He looks down at their clasped hands before moving his gaze back to her. He's racking his brain for something to say, and the first thing he comes up with is, "You're drunk."

She shakes her head and laughs embarrassedly. "Right, I shouldn't have asked, you probably have a schedule tomorrow."

"I don't," he chuckles. "What I meant was, you might not want me up there with you when you sober up." She looks down and starts chewing on her nails again, before he playfully swats her hand away. "You said you were going to stop biting your nails."

"Yeah, yeah," she waves him off. "So are you coming, or what?"

"Do you want me to?"

She doesn't think twice. "Yes."

"Then I will."

They won't sleep together and they will, because Jiyeon's not sure if she's ready to have this thing back in her life, when it had fallen apart simply because she didn't know how to deal with being happy. She's a work in progress, she's known that ever since she screwed up what they had, but as she peels off her clothes and climbs into bed in her underwear, she wonders if she's no longer the toxic girl who had thrived on conflict and did everything to push him away; wonders if she's become the kind of person who she thought Myungsoo deserved. _Not that it'd be that easy_ , she thinks to herself. More worries pop up in her mind, her thoughts too fast for her to completely comprehend, but the words  _scandal_ ,  _schedules_ , _fights_  take center stage and seem to edge every other thought out of her brain. She rolls over onto her side of the bed, her back to him, and she feels his weight as he settles down on the edge of the bed, pulling his shirt over his head and sliding off his jeans.

He gets under the covers with her, tentatively stroking her hair before wrapping his arm around her. She doesn't move, but when he begins to pull away, she grabs his hand and pulls his arm tighter around her body. He chuckles softly, his thumb stroking the back of her hand. "I miss holding your hand," he says absently, already beginning to drift off to sleep. 

She suddenly shifts, turns her body to face him. "I miss it, too." He grins and pushes her hair away from her face, before pulling her closer. She rests her head on his chest, humming contentedly. "I miss sleeping next to you." She's sobered up a bit, she knows that this is very dangerous territory right here and the anxious thoughts return as she wonders if this might end badly. But when he puts his hand on the back of her neck and slowly leans forward to kiss her, the thoughts go away faster than they came.

He moves closer until their lips are barely an inch apart, and he can hear his heart pounding in his ears. Her big eyes are staring into his when she licks her lips nervously, and finally, he kisses her.

* * *

 

 

> **private chat  
>  6:43 pm / saturday**
> 
> **myungpoo** : thank you  
>  **myungpo** **o** : for last night  
>  **jiwhiz** : lol im the one who should be thanking u  
>  **jiwhiz** : sorry i was so drunk  
>  **myungpoo** : dont worry bout it  
>  **myungpoo** : besides we got to sleep in so i dont mind  
>  **myungpoo** : but try to stay sober for a while, can't always be there to rescue you  
>  **jiwhiz** : ahahaha yeah yeah i will  
>  **jiwhiz** : we always sleep good next to each other  
>  **myungpoo** : we really do   
>  **myungpoo** : ill see u tonight?  
>  **jiwhiz** : han gang? who's coming  
>  **jiwhiz** : and im supposed to be staying sober arent i  
>  **myungpoo** : lol well i'm gonna be there to rescue u this time so u can  
>  **jiwhiz** : ahah cute  
>  **myungpoo** : let's go together?  
>  **jiwhiz** : ofc  
>  **jiwhiz** : oh, and myung  
>  **myungpoo** : yea?  
>  **jiwhiz** : yeah, i did miss your car :p

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> myungyeon chapter bc i miss my fav ship! this is all gonna be very slice-of-life-y so it's not going to have a very linear storyline, and important plot points or events wont be happening within the chapters a lot of the time so it may seem boring or uneventful but hopefully im an okay enough writer for you guys to still enjoy it! i really hope this fic will be able to tackle a lot of idol issues too re: things like dating, mental health, legal stuff, post-scandal careers, substance abuse, etc.


	3. Chapter 3

> **private chat  
>  1:18 am / sunday**
> 
> **yeollipop** : u wanna go together later?   
>  **chansick** : uh  
>  **chansick** : im not going later hahah  
>  **yeollipop** : why  
>  **chansick** : kinda busy tomorrow  
>  **yeollipop** : ayt ayt  
>  **yeollipop** : is jinyoung going?  
>  **chansick** : idk? probably haha  
>  **chansick** : u should ask him

* * *

Gongchan sighs as he tosses his phone aside and quickly resumes playing Overwatch, putting his headphones back on. He feels a little off tonight, and his eyes that dart back and forth on the screen are slightly unfocused, unlike how they usually are. When he gets killed for what seemed like the tenth time that night, he grits his teeth and exits the game in annoyance before the final round can even start. 

He stands up and moves away from his setup, stretching his arms above himself and twisting his back. He lets out a groan and steps out into the living room, looking around. It's messier than he usually leaves it, and if he's being completely honest with himself it's because a clean apartment just reminds him that he's the only one living there anymore. The other B1A4 members had all moved out, leaving Gongchan to live in what used to be their shared dorm, and although he understood that five adult men living in a cramped space wasn't such an appealing option anymore, back then at least he knew that he'd still be seeing them often.

But since Jinyoung and Baro chose to leave the company, none of them have spoken, apart from awkward texts for professional stuff. The management is still discussing the future of the group, and although Gongchan has high hopes, he knows that even if they were to continue as five, it wouldn't be as easy and fulfilling as it had once been. They all know they're still friends, even with the lack of contact lately, and despite feeling resentful about their decision, the remaining members understand it even without having it explained to them.

Jinyoung has so much potential - he's one of the most talented artists today, and WM just couldn't give him the opportunities that he wanted. He loves B1A4 more than anything - they're his brothers - but as brothers he knows they'll understand that he wants to go his own way, even for a little while. Baro feels the same, and while he knows nothing will ever compare to his time with the group, he's learned everything he could from being in B1A4, and it's time to retire that side of him for now. 

Since WM is still deciding how to go about the whole two-members-in-different-companies thing, if they really push through with it anyway, the members are stuck in some sort of strange purgatory - do they continue hanging out like the possibility of parting ways looming over their heads isn't there? Mostly, they're scared. Their friendship is strong enough and transcends just being in a group together, but the entertainment industry is harsh. Members leaving groups are always hot news topics - and they're even hotter when the media can milk it as a bitter split. EXO, Infinite, Super Junior, Teen Top, U-Kiss, Beast, all of which are groups everyone believed to be tight-knit and unbreakable - Gongchan's mind spins as he remembers all the articles of former members talking about their groups - some with very subtle anger, others quite blatant. He doesn't want to think that B1A4 will end up having anything but a peaceful separation, but there's no telling how things might end up.

He shakes himself from his trance and tells himself that they might not have to deal with it at all. He prays everyday they still continue as five, but until he's sure, he'd rather keep to himself. He kind of feels bad for not reaching out, but whenever he thinks of making a call, he remembers that none of the others had thought to check on him, either. 

Mostly, he's upset that he can't talk about it to Chanyeol, Zico or Yoona. More than anyone else in the group, they always seem to know what to say, especially when it comes to difficult things like that. He had tried to call Zico earlier that night to ask to meet up, but he had simply said they could talk when the gang meets up later. Gongchan had replied, "Ah, right, okay," and hung up after saying goodbye. He doesn't want to go there and run the risk of seeing Jinyoung, especially when they still haven't talked. He'd ask someone to ask if Jinyoung was going, but he doesn't want to start talk amongst their group - they had always prided themselves on being honest with each other, and there was no way he would be the one to start a divide.

Without even thinking, he grabs his phone and coat from the bedroom and heads out. He steps out of the apartment building and into the cold night, and makes his way to the nearest soju tent he finds. It's kind of empty for a Saturday night, but he finds that he doesn't mind. "Ahjumma, a bowl of ramyun and a bottle of soju, please!" The old lady minding the stall nods and gives him a smile as he takes a seat. Within moments, the ahjumma is bringing over a bowl of steaming ramyun and the familiar green soju bottle. She sets them down on the table and gives him a shot glass.

"Young man, you look troubled," she says, and Gongchan can only laugh weakly. She continues, "I hope you know that burdens are easier to carry when you have someone to walk with. So drink alone with your thoughts tonight, and when you've gotten them straightened out, share them with someone who might not  necessarily understand, but you know will always be there for you." She pauses, and laughs. "I'm sorry, this old lady is probably making you feel awkward. Enjoy your night."

He shakes his head and offers her a soft but genuine smile. "No, ma'am. In fact, I think I needed to hear that. Thank you for the food; I'll eat well." He bows his head slightly and she returns it before walking back to the stall. He opens the soju bottle and pours himself a shot. He brings it to his lips and downs the liquor quickly, before setting the glass down and picking up his chopsticks. He's slurping up the hot ramen when a figure stands in front of his table and clears his throat. He looks up mid-bite, noodles still hanging out of his mouth, and when he recognizes his leader, he immediately sucks in the food and swallows with slight difficulty. He winces at the small pain in his throat but speaks. "Hyung."

Jinyoung smiles at him. "Can I sit?" Gongchan nods, and Jinyoung takes the seat in front of him. "Ahjumma, another glass here, please!" 

She quickly hands him the glass, and as Gongchan moves to pour him the alcohol, Jinyoung waves him off. "Let me," he says, refilling both their glasses. He moves one toward Gongchan and raises his. "Cheers," he grins, and Gongchan does the same. Suddenly, his worries don't seem so daunting, and as he and Jinyoung take their shots, the warmth he feels inside his body grows and he knows it's not from the alcohol.

"I've missed you, hyung," he admits. Jinyoung gazes at him thoughtfully before telling him he's missed him too. "Have you talked to the others?"

"No," Jinyoung says with a sigh. "I'm kind of scared to. Are you guys angry at us? Especially me? I mean, I'm the leader. I'm supposed to be keeping the group together, and here I am, I'm abandoning you guys. I feel so terrible and selfish-"

"Hyung," Gongchan interrupts. He doesn't want to hear his hyung, one of the strongest people he knows, say such things about himself. Jinyoung looks at him apologetically, and Gongchan takes a moment to think about the question, before shaking his head. "I think we were angry at first," he says, choosing his words carefully, "but we know you better than anyone, and we know that you wouldn't do something like this unless you knew that you needed to. The last thing we want to do is hold you back."

"I never thought you guys were holding me back," Jinyoung reassures him. "There's just so much more I know I could be doing, and the company can't give me the opportunities I need anymore. If it were up to me, me and Baro would still be with you guys, even under different agencies. Contracts just tend to fucking suck," he sighs again. "But we're working something out."

The maknae nods. "I know. I'm still hopeful."

"Me, too."

They end up finishing two more bottles of soju in the next hour, and by three in the morning, Jinyoung and Gongchan are stumbling on the streets, arms slung over each other's shoulders as they laugh and sing loudly into the cold night. A sleek white sedan slows down next to them, and the passenger window rolls down. 

"Tsk, tsk, look at these celebrities drunkenly walking around Seoul," Yoona says with a laugh. The two B1A4 members squint and try to make out her figure, and when they realize who it is, they both exclaim in surprise and burst out laughing.

"Noona!" Jinyoung slurs. She rolls her eyes playfully and unbuckles her seatbelt, stepping out of the driver's seat and making her way to them. She opens up the rear door and helps Gongchan into the backseat, closing the door after him. She opens the passenger door and gestures for Jinyoung to get in, but he can only stare at her blankly. She groans in slight frustration before pushing him into the seat.

She hops back in and continues driving, and glances at Gongchan in her rearview mirror. He's passed out drunk, mouth hanging open, and she laughs. "Jinyoung-ah, what did you do to your baby!"

Jinyoung snickers next to her. "Noona, we got drunk."

"I can see that," she says between giggles. "I was gonna head to the spot, but I think you guys should get home." He shakes his head. 

"No, it's fine, we'll go."

"Hmm, are you sure? You guys are already pretty gone," she points out. Jinyoung simply nods, and she adjusts her grip on the steering wheel before shrugging. "Alright, but no puking in my car."

He laughs. "I won't, swear. I c-can't make the same promise for Chan, though." She rolls her eyes.

They're already pulling into the abandoned lot when she changes the topic. "I thought you said you weren't coming tonight." He sighs, and he doesn't have to say anything for her to understand. "You feel weird after leaving the agency, huh? That's something I was worried about when I heard the news. But from what I saw tonight, you and Gongchan are fine." She parks and can see several figures sitting in the distance, and over the hum of the engine she can make out their familiar voices.

"This is probably the first time we've talked in almost a month," Jinyoung admits. "What about when Jessica left? You must've felt this way, too." Yoona considers it for a moment, before responding.

"No, honestly. It was..." she pauses, figuring out what to say. "It was different, because Jessica was planning on leaving for a long time. GG stopped being a priority, and we all understood, but for a lot of us it just got harder and harder to be around someone who no longer shared the same vision. And the agency ended up making her leave seven months before she planned to. I'll always love her, and it's a shame things ended so badly, but I believe it was for the best," she says comfortingly. "That may not be what you want to hear, but that's how we dealt with it because it was such a different situation."

Outside, she sees their other friends wonder why she's not exiting the car, and in the darkness she can make out Chanyeol walking towards the vehicle before bending down and knocking on her window. She knows better than to tell him to go away so she unlocks the door and he opens the back door, bursting into laughter when he sees Gongchan's unconscious body strewn over the backseat. He pushes him onto one side and climbs in, closing the door loudly. Gongchan groans in his sleep and turns away, a string of curses escaping his mouth involuntarily, making the three people in the car laugh even harder. 

"Noona, why are you still in the car?" Chanyeol asks. "Mark brought Jäger, let's get fucked up!" She gives Jinyoung a slightly apologetic look. 

"Jinyoung and I were talking about something important, but I knew you'd be annoying, so I let you in," she jokes. Chanyeol feigns being hurt, placing his hand over his chest dramatically. Jinyoung lets out a small chuckle.

"What's this important thing, then?" Chanyeol says, leaning forward in the middle seat. "Maybe I can help!" He flashes Jinyoung his classic grin. 

"Don't pressure him, idiot," Yoona scolds him before slapping his head lightly and turning to Jinyoung. "But Chanyeol might have something good to say; he's gone through members leaving, too." Chanyeol's mouth forms into a small O as he realizes what they'd been discussing.

He reaches into his jacket pocket and pulls out a long, finely rolled joint. "Okay, but just so it doesn't get too heavy, I propose we hotbox while we do." Yoona laughs and nods in agreement. Chanyeol nudges Jinyoung. "You down, bro?" Jinyoung doesn't smoke weed much, but he's drunk and he supposes he can guilt Yoona into bringing him and Gongchan home if he gets too fucked up, so he shrugs.

"Spark it."

* * *

> **HAN GANG group chat  
>  3:39 am / sunday**
> 
> **pcyeol** : we r smoking up in yoonas car  
>  **ziaco** : u couldnt have stepped out to say that?  
>  **pcyeol** : that defeats the purpose of a hotbox  
>  **pcyeol** : duh  
>  **pcyeol** : anyway we can fit one  
>  **pcyeol** : maybe two ppl  
>  **markymark** : can i get in on that  
>  **yoonim** : yez  
>  **ziaco** : me toooo  
>  **yoonim** : zico mark g come in  
>  **krys** : fuck u guys  
>  **pcyeol** : yup i see u all flipping me off from inside the car

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! to be continued bc this chapter's getting pretty long haha. most of the things in this fic i try to base off of real things, e.g. jessica planning to leave but getting kicked out, why jinyoung and baro left, etc. i get these from pretty credible sources, but of course i took artistic license for story purposes.
> 
> up next, the smoke sesh in yoona's car, chanyeol talking about former exo members (and ehem ehem how one departure affected yoona more than she would like to admit), gongchan smokes weed for the first time and more!
> 
> p.s. i'm thinking of replacing sulli with joy bc tbh i dont ship chanlli as much as i used to and i think it'd be too complicated considering she's not in f(x) anymore and two f(x) members are in han gang. let me know what you think! bc if i replace sulli with joy i might replace some other characters too!


End file.
